


Enjoy the Silence

by gloatingraccoon



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Canon Compliant, Drowning, F/M, Healing, SGRUB
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-04
Updated: 2012-12-04
Packaged: 2017-11-20 07:21:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/582766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gloatingraccoon/pseuds/gloatingraccoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sollux wasn’t sure how it had happened precisely, but he knew Feferi had saved his life, and now they were rising up through the water, lips locked together as she let him breathe through her. For a moment he became lost in the rhythm of their own breathing, and the voices fell completely silent. And right in that moment, for the first time in years, he felt safe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Enjoy the Silence

**Author's Note:**

> Set during Sgrub, while Sollux and Feferi are adventuring together through the Lands. Took some liberties with the setting so this isn't really any of their Lands in particular.

Sollux had no real idea how it had happened precisely. He remembered slipping into the ice cold pond when a particularly dreadful ogre of a kind he hadn’t seen yet had caught him off guard, he remembered the pain in his knees, the water engulfing him. He remembered the sudden pain in his ankle, and the voices in his head turning into a deafening, screaming chaos as something latched and started dragging him down. He remembered he couldn’t breathe anymore, nor see, nor think as the water swallowed all traces of light in that bizarre world.

Memories became increasingly vague at that point. A golden light flaring through the liquid oblivion, the weight pulling him down abandoning him, then a dark shape surrounding him, something softly brushing his lips, and suddenly.

Suddenly air. Air filled his lungs again, bringing his senses back, calming the chaos raging between his ears. A swarm of bubbles tickled his face, and as his stinging eyes swam back into focus, he found a familiar face just inches from his. Behind purple goggles, Feferi smiled at him, her little side fins vibrating, her hair blown around her like a fluffy, inky cloud. He only had a moment of surprise before she cupped his face in her hands, pressed her lips to his and blew air into him again. As he relaxed in relief, he felt her arms wrap around his waist to hold him, then a jolt of her legs, a shift in their weight and he realized they were slowly rising up through the water, lips still locked together as she let him breathe through her. Some part of him yearned for more, more air, more speed to get out of those killing waters as soon as possible, but a more rational side of him reminded him of what could happen to blood after a fast decrease in pressure, and as the weight of water gradually released him, the voices calmed down once more. Hesitantly he clung to her, closing his hands on her shoulders, and the cloud of her hair swallowed him, wrapping him in a web of darkness and soft, silky ribbons. And for a moment he became lost in the rhythm of their shared breathing, and the rush of bubbles as they exhaled. For just a moment, the voices fell completely silent… and he felt safe, for the first time in years.

Only as the waters finally released them they broke contact, and Sollux found himself panting and huffing, face hidden in her shoulder, unable to do anything but breathe all the fresh air he could, and stay relaxed as she carried him to the rocky shore. With just a little effort, she pulled him up onto a big, flat rock, and between the chaos of fear and relief that raged within him, he marveled at her strength. Granted, he doubted he was much heavier than her, what with his bony, lanky nerd physique, but Feferi certainly didn’t have Vriska’s athletic, powerful frame, or Nepeta’s cat-like muscles. She just looked… light. Now that he could see her like that, though, in the silvery, unnatural light of that bizarre world, as she stood beside him, trident in hand, clearly scouting their surroundings for attackers - he started noticing the lean muscle lines moving in her shoulders, the toned tension in her legs. Of course, it should come as no surprise to him that Feferi was built like a swimmer, and having the purest purple blood, she had to be amazingly strong. He also noticed how stray water droplets made her skin glisten like silver, and how the wet skirt covering her swimsuit clung to her backside. A damn cute, perky backside. Sollux swallowed. But he didn’t really like where that train of thought was going. Luckily the voices were growing louder and more confused by the moment and he had no trouble losing his concentration. Apparently satisfied with her inspection of their surroundings, Feferi hung her trident to the strap on her back and kneeled beside him.

“It’s all quiet, for the moment,” she said in a soothing tone. “How are you feeling?”

She lightly caressed his face, sending a few water droplets down his neck, which made him shiver even soaked as he was. Confused, would have been the most spontaneous answer to the question. Confused as fuck, shared shitless, overwhelmed, helpless. And dumb, also. Dumb was always an option. But the lost cause of his mental health was not the matter at the moment, so he cast that aside. He could feel bruises in his knees and around his ankle, where whatever horrible creature lived in that pond had grabbed him, but he knew nothing was broken.

“No theriouth damage, jutht… exhauthted. And cold,” he managed to say between deep breaths and a chattering of fangs. The slab of rock he was lying on was oddly warm compared to the icy waters, but it didn’t help much. Damn, his lisp sounded even worse like that. Feferi gave him a worried frown.

“You’re shaking,” she said, rubbing at his arms. “You’ve never even… been in the water before, have you?”

Sollux arched his eyebrows at that. Of course he hadn’t. Only seadwellers were fit to survive Alternia’s cold, acidic waters. He knew Gamzee enjoyed to take a swim now and then, but it was not an easy feat or one he could endure for long. And Gamzee was an indigo blood - and an indigo blood with a very shaky notion of what was healthy for a young troll. A low blood like himself would never survive the experience. Before he could speak, Feferi held out a hand.

“I know, I know… dumb question. Sorry,” she said. “Still… you’re going to be sick if we don’t warm you up.”

Sollux had a moment of surprise before the girl lay down to snuggle with him, slipping her arms around his shoulders. He flushed at her gentle, soft contact, then a deep shiver ran through him as her warmth seemed to flow through his skin, filling and wrapping him, soothing the cold in his bones. Weren’t seadwellers supposed to be cold, to survive their harsh environment? Then again, she was the Witch of Life. It made sense that if warmth was what she had to give to heal, she could give that. Inadvertently, a hum of relief escaped his throat. And he instantly regretted it. He deliberately avoided her eyes, but he knew she was looking at him, smiling.

“A little betta?”

Sollux barely noticed the fish pun and gulped, still concentrating on that undefined spot between her ear fins and her shoulder, since that was not her face and so worked just fine. He must have dropped his glasses somewhere in the fight and felt even more awkward than usual without them.

“Yeth. Um… thankth.”

He expected her to pull away at this point, but she did not. Instead, she squeezed closer and slowly ran her hands up and down his back, and he held his breath at the heat wave that followed. He tensed, but he didn’t pull away as she scooted slightly lower and her hands followed the shape of his legs, warmth soothing the soreness in his muscles and joints. His hips tried to buck for a moment as her hands found their way up again on his back, in an instinct he had no clear idea what to do with. She didn’t seem to notice, thankfully, and wrapped her fingers on the back of his neck, just lying there by his side, letting him soak in her warmth. It almost felt like just a hug, even though she was pretty much hugging a statue right now, since he didn’t dare move. Yet his fingers, lain down relaxed on his leg, itched. It almost felt like that was just a hug, and not a teammate helping another. Which was strange in itself, to be honest. Sollux just wasn’t used to being taken care of: sure, there was Aradia, but that was a long time ago and things had grown much colder between them since that incident that still haunted his nightmares on a regular basis. This was new, and he wasn’t quite sure what this even was in the first place. It almost felt like he could just move his hands to her waist and return the hug.

Almost. But that was not a hug, and his stupid, broken think pan was again going places it didn’t belong. What was he even thinking. He was the Mage of Doom, for fuck’s sake. He shouldn’t even get too close to the Witch of Life, let alone hug her. The unmistakable, pinkish hue tinging the grey of her skin on her fins and shoulder was more than enough to drive the voices mad with fury and shame. As much as he hated them, he was lucky to have them to keep him grounded.

Yet he just couldn’t bring himself to pull away. Whether that warmth, that closeness was a hug or not - he needed that. He wanted that. Whatever that was. He swallowed.

“We thould go,” he said, yet not moving.

“We’re safe for now,” she whispered, hiding her face in the hollow of his neck. “And you should rest and recover.”

He took a big breath. If he couldn’t pull away, maybe he could make her do it instead. He was a real pro at pushing people away after all.

“You don’t have to do thith.”

She shifted slightly to look at him. Her fingers closed on his chin, and reluctantly he stopped evading her stare. He flushed at realizing how close she really was. He could see her long lashes vibrating under her goggles. She looked surprised, and a little troubled.

“You saved my life, Sollux,” she said. Taken aback, he shook his head at that.

“That meanth nothing. It’th not a debt, you don’t owe me anything.”

She furrowed her brow, her surprise turning to tension.

“That’s exactly the point. You saved my life, and you didn’t do it because you had to, or because of this stupid game. You did it because it was the right thing to do, because you cared. Is it so hard for you to believe someone cares about you?”

Her bottom lip quivered a little as her breath seemed to falter. What was that rush of fuchsia tinging her cheeks? Was she blushing? He was probably blushing in turn, judging from the sudden warmth that had wrapped his face. Damn. He wished he could control that. He wished he could turn away and not have to face those deep, wide eyes, so intense and bare to him, so blinding and wonderful and frightening at the same time. But he could not.

And suddenly, as her hands tenderly cupped his face and she moved closer, he realized he knew what was about to happen. Suddenly everything was still and ringing with clarity, shining and fragile like glass, and he didn’t even dare to breathe. Suddenly the voices fell silent.

And she kissed him.

He had kissed Aradia before. More than once. But that had been a long time ago, and so many things had changed from then that right now, this felt completely new. He didn’t know those lips, those fangs, that mouth. The warm wet of her mouth over his, caressing, both gentle and powerful, wanting and yet asking for his permission. This was she, Feferi Peixes, the Heiress Apparent. She who could have had rich, powerful, royal seadouchebag Eridan Ampora at her feet with a snap of her fingers, if she so wished. This was she, wanting not simply his lips, but his kiss. His consent. Him.

This was new, and he wasn’t quite sure he remembered what he was supposed to do.

And he didn’t give a fuck.

He kissed her back, returning her caresses with the same gentle touch, and as she shivered all over against him at that, he found his hands moving on their own accord. The coarse canvas of his jeans under his fingertips turned into the slick texture of her swimtop, then the silky ripples of her hair, the smooth, damp skin of her arms, her shoulders, the curve of her jaw. As he gathered her closer, their fangs awkwardly clicked together in the kiss and they winced. Damn that stupid overjet.

“Thorry,” he mumbled, and was relieved to see her smiling.

“It’s okay,” she whispered between kisses, and judging from the soft caress of her tongue along his fangs, she really didn’t mind in the slightest. Hesitantly he returned the favour, running the tip of his tongue against her fangs - sharp and well formed, with only slightly longer canines - and as she opened up to him with a delightful thrill, any trace of insecurity he might have melted away in warmth, and taste, and softness, and the salty smell of the water clinging to their clothes.

They separated reluctantly, and just looked at each other for a while, Feferi running her fingers through his short hair, Sollux caressing the curve of her face. She shuddered and chuckled as his fingers brushed her ear fin, apparently ticklish, and he laughed along. He realized he had the dumbest smile plastered on his face, and he couldn’t care less. All he could think of was how he just wanted to stay there and get drunk on those gorgeous eyes, and keep finding ways to make her smile and laugh, and make her feel just as cherished and in peace as she did with him. He knew the exhausting swing between manic and depressed would hit him again soon, he knew the voices will inevitably come back to haunt him - but in the face of all doom and misery his visions painted clearly before them, she made him think there was still something to hope for. He wanted to say something, but he couldn’t find anything that quite fit that moment, and he didn’t want to admit it was really time to go now.

He would remember for a long time what she said before they resumed their journey.

“You matter, Sollux Captor. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise… not even yourself.”


End file.
